RECAP:  Step right up!  The Backwoodz Oddities adventures begins through the façade of a bigger-than-life clown's mouth with the first stop being The Snack Shack, where an oven door mysteriously opens and closes on its own, and a villainous cook attempts to feed customers generous helpings of human remains!  Walking through her refrigerator accesses the laboratory of a maniacal doctor anxious to perform lobotomies on potential new patients, then it’s onto a prison where flickering lights spawn an unexpected entrapment with a jailed convict!  Blasts of air trigger her release guiding advancement into an Arcade that’s inhabited by a pair of clowns arguing over their favorite color and highlighted by a crane game filled with dolls, but all its claw can grab and pick up is a decapitated head!

From there, a conflict with an abusive mom discovers one her babies entrapped in a cage while another’s been hanged and drips blood into a sink, and a third roasts like chestnuts over an open fire!  A big brute waits in the wings threatening to decapitate intruders with a large, metal knife he uses to blast sparks in every direction!  Fleeing through a foggy skid maze brings about a treacherous, pick-a-door, chainsaw ensnarement, where all the doors are labeled #2!  Discovery of the correct way out leads into the woods for a lethal battle with a lunatic armed with a sharp blade fully intent on slicing everyone’s neck open!  

Bloody torsos guide the way to a sad, over-sized bunny seen rocking a coffin.  Interrupting the funeral displeases the “rascally rabbit,” who quickly hops into action weaponized with a Taser!  Pressing forward into the Last Carnival Bar, the bartender serves up some much-needed laughter as she teasingly drums up a volunteer to work alongside her on the club’s stripper pole for the attraction’s upcoming Hell Night!

Fire and brimstone accompanies departure from the saloon and returning to the forest as flames shoot skyward, and a demonic priest turned Devil stands over a spellbinding pentagram loudly proclaiming, “Nobody is leaving with their souls!”  Round #2 with the door #2s is staged around a wildly spinning floor in the company of a trio of evil, girl clowns clutching onto rubber chickens that make one group member drop to her knees and… bark like a dog!  (Just wait till Hell Night!)

Finally locating an accessible route crosses a colorful, tilting bridge into “Jack's House,” a circus of fun and games inhabited by a jester carrying a big sledge hammer he uses to show off his strength by ringing High Striker’s bell with a bloody, severed head!  Another challenge involves audience participation by throwing a ball against a nearby target, but so doing energizes electrical current, thus electrocuting an innocent, restrained clown.  Mysteriously an oversized stack of building blocks splits in two exposing a previously unseen secret passage that soon dumps into a third door #2 chainsaw entanglement!  This time the proper hatch dumps back into the woods where a vicious clown swings an aluminum bat, and loudly revs up a powerful motor that’s better suited for a demo derby car!

Winding past an adjacent creek returns the course to a final door #2 scenario protected by another triple chainsaw onslaught that yields to an intimidating confrontation with a robed, half man/half skull-faced creature that gives way past an alien-like being sporting huge orange wings and glowing red eyes into Painland that finds diabolical magician Cletus performing tricks that go tragically wrong!

Witnessing the result of a cheerleader sacrifice sends the path through a wooden pallet maze that exits through a fog-filled, laser-lit tunnel to a ferocious chainsaw chase-out of Backwoodz Oddities, The Last Carnival Haunted House!

ANALYSIS:  This is one of the more cleverly built attractions in existence incorporating several pick-a-door entrapments into the journey, complete with dead ends, loops, lots of chainsaws, and multiple diversions that land you right back into similar door #2 predicaments!  Course has always been admired for ingenious design making use of secret passages like the building blocks and freezer; utilizing sparks, fire, and a unique spinning floor; and several repetitions of being trapped and pinned in.  This year, direction of outdoor travel has been reversed to freshen things up as well.

Memorable characters include jailbird, motor man, chainsaw freaks, spinning floor clown girls with their chickens, spark brute, mom, and bartender.  Transgender woman does a good job entertaining the queue line and preparing the crowd.

Cost of general admission is only $15 making this one of the best bargains in the entire Ohio Valley and group size is limited to 5 to insure customers get the best show possible!  Fast Passes sell for $25.  The attraction runs Fridays and Saturdays from October 4^th – November 2^nd, 8 PM to Midnight, with their popular Hell Night scheduled for 11/2 featuring an appearance by The GOREgeous Girls Horror Models!  Other special events include Chainsaw Night on Oct. 5, Juggalo Night Oct. 19, and their Lights On tour Oct. 26^th from 2 – 4 PM, a kid-friendly, scare-free way to see what goes bump in the dark!

The attraction's primary beneficiary is Southern Ohio Survivors, but they also donate to other local charities including animal shelters, schools, food banks, and an adult summer league baseball team.

Ohio Valley Haunts will be back on Hell Night!  See you there!