RECAP & ANALYSIS:   2022 marks the 26th anniversary of the haunted scream park, and no other venue even comes close to matching the atmosphere and professionalism set forth at Land of Illusion!  Six uniquely themed haunted attractions filled with impressive props, theatrical lighting, complimentary soundtracks, etc., and staffed by energetic actors join hands with food, soft drinks, adult beverages, and a gift shop to create an unmatched entertainment experience!  This is the place to be for quality seasonal scares and Halloween fun!

MIDDLETOWN HAUNTED TRAIL:  Entrance into this legendary attraction begins across a green, toxic stream that’s shadowed by a strange, irate girl barking announcements and warnings along the lines of, “It’s about time I got to see someone down here!” and “You’ll be next to die!”  Contaminated sewage spews forth out of pipes mutating ordinary rats into rabid rodents the size of dogs in advance of a high-impact, multi-attack zone tagged “Area 49!”  Here, monsters and albino gators rise from the depths of foggy, murky water, then toxic fiends go on the assault, and a man-eating crocodile sideswipes out of the surrounding poisonous waste!  Escape soon leads to a life threatening encounter with the infamous, knife-wielding slasher, Michael Myers!  (Scene is extremely well executed as you hear the theme from the “Halloween” movies teasing his arrival just prior to laying eyes on “the bogeyman” himself, then the lights go out and he vanishes briefly, only to reappear the instant light is restored for an up close and personal attempted stabbing!)

Other scenes include an underground quagmire of mayhem inhabited by an irate doctor and his bloody nurses that are seen man-handling their distraught patients, throwing them down on beds, and restraining them within old jailhouse-like holding cells; a newly constructed village, where witches gather to brew up mysterious scares; and buildings infested with large spider-webs!  Proceeding ushers in a path blocking confrontation with “Giggles” the clown, soon followed by an isolated walk over Cherry Hill’s covered bridge that’s guarded by The Headless Horseman!

There’s never a dull moment as vicious hillbillies lie in wait unleashing a chainsaw rampage that’s accompanied by a yokel clad only in a soiled diaper who’s armed with a taser as if just the sight of him wasn’t already “shocking” enough!

The remainder of the trail ventures through an oversized pumpkin patch, into blood-spattered buildings, and through a spook-filled cemetery (where the late Michael McKnight among others was laid to rest) on its way to a darkened run-in with some sort of “Night Stalker,” a spiked wall surprise, a conflict with a flame-throwing ghoul waving a blowtorch, a battle with Freddy Krueger, and a visit to Hell itself, where Satan’s servants steal some souls before you come face-to-face with The Devil himself!

Still to come is a snorting clash with a giant, squealing, actor- tronic oinker, a kitchen filled with bloody body parts, the funeral service of a young boy, a 3-D room featuring a double spinning vortex rotating in opposite directions, a genocide of repulsive bugs, before finally being ordered out of this action-packed excursion better known as The Middletown Haunted Trail.

Horseman, blowtorch, spiked walls, inverted school buses, pumpkin patch, Area 49, witch village, and actor-tronic monsters stand out from a prop perspective.  Memorable characters include outraged girl attacking and screaming in first scene, toxic villains, Myers, Freddy, underground entourage, chainsaw hillbilly assailants, and diaper man. 

Devil needs to be more domineering.  Vortex, back flipping clown “Beazil” is missed, and the final scene needs to be ramped up, but otherwise, the Trail is pretty much non-stop excitement from beginning to end!

DR PSYCHO’S HAUNTED ESTATE:  The exploration begins with a seasonal photo-op prior to decent through a frightening passageway leading to a murderous torture chamber.  Severed, human appendages stock the freezer and dangle from conveyor hooks in the Doctor’s butcher shop, while an outdoor segment winds its way past a spooky cemetery, wrecked ambulances, and an unearthed grave!  Blood-drenched corridors connect a variety of rooms inside the Estate itself, including a life-sustaining laboratory staffed by the doctor’s brother seen operating on their latest creation, and a dimly-lit séance room where evil is conjured via a mysterious Ouija board!  Hissing snakes, coffins, a “Mongo” surprise, and a flaming crematorium must likewise be avoided in advance of a run-in with Dr. Christopher Psycho himself, who summons a humongous, ax-wielding brute that provides a vicious chase-out of Dr. Psycho’s Haunted Estate!

Doctor, brother Psycho, and Ax-wielder are most memorable characters.  Pig-faced butcher is noticeably absent.  Flames provide impressive scares in the crematorium.  Soundtrack is creepy and scary throughout.  Relocation of Dr. Psycho near the end builds tension prior to his encounter, and properly focuses more attention on him since the event bears his name.

TEMPLE OF TERROR:  The spooky journey begins inside a vibrating elevator that drops into the depths of the Temple. Dimly-lit chambers, shrinking passages, moving floors, skeletal captives, mummies, hieroglyphics, animatronic beasts, a falling ceiling, an unstable rope bridge over a watery abyss accompanied by a near decapitation, and one of the eeriest soundtracks around highlight the adventure!  

Best Actors are “Melvin” the elevator attendant and the camouflaged “Ghillie” monster.

KILLER KLOWNS:  “Bozo” and “Pinball” torment the queue line, while the Funhouse itself features colorfully painted wall décor, a pair of spinning vortexes, a shrinking room, tilting floors within a life-size pinball machine, a chain-link fence maze, a claustrophobia passage over a bottomless pit, clown animatronics, and a slew of tormenting klowns armed with an assortment of weapons!

Girl clown slamming a baseball bat on the floor and swinging it high above our heads stands out.  “Craze” is likewise memorable for his aggressive attacks, as is the path-blocking Heckles.  Misdirecting klowns wildly climbing the fence inside the maze also leave a lasting impression.  Orange-haired sledgehammer klown can’t be forgotten, nor the relentless antics of the aforementioned “Bozo!”

PHOBIA:  This face-your-fears attraction is designed to exploit various personal anxieties and aversions.  Accompanied by an abundance of frightening noises, a complimentary soundtrack that adds to the disorientation, and an occasional foul smell or two, scenes tug at your emotional stability by visiting a near-miss hit-and-run surprise, an electrocution, Dr. Death’s Covid-19 booster shots, snakes, spiders, cocoons, bugs, and so on!  Random monsters pop out of hiding throughout, while advancement is challenged by darkness and dense, vision-obscuring fog making it even more difficult to discover the hidden, claustrophobic escape from Phobia.

Most memorable characters are Dr. Death and the well-hidden electrocution surprise!  Ending is fantastic and smells are unforgettable!  Ghouls armed with light “zappers” are conspicuous by their absence.

DYSPHORIA:  The rebranded “Big Mama’s Revenge” consists of an uncertain, light-limited maze that finds exploration complicated by an assortment of large tires and a series of confusing, pick-a-door passages.

Duration is unpredictable depending upon one’s success in navigating the three pick-a-door segments and finding the way out.  Redesigning one of the segments so that the first door you come to isn't the correct path would insure exploration of the "wrong" doors, thus proving beneficial to the overall experience.

OVERALL:  The park offers a number of amenities including fire pits, a variety of food such as Cassano's pizza, fresh-baked doughnuts and Creepy Café hot dogs, and even adult beverages served in The Voodoo Lounge for guests 21 years of age and older.  Nightly entertainment ranging from popular bands to Micro Wrestling is included with admission.  Don't forget to stop by The Ghostly Gift Shop that's stocked full of souvenirs, Halloween and venue-themed T-shirts, and accessories.   And be sure to check out your group photos prior to leaving.

The event is anchored by The Middletown Haunted Trail along with five uniquely themed supporting attractions.  Energy is high for the most part, with the Trail and Klowns checking in a notch above the others.  This is a most PROFESSIONAL operation, and the atmosphere is arguably unmatched in the haunt industry.  The $55 general admission ticket grants UNLIMITED ACCESS to all six attractions.  Park opens at 7 PM along with Temple of Terror and Killer Klowns.  The others don't get started until approximately 8, or once it gets dark, and haunts remain open until 1 AM, which amounts to 6 hours of seasonal fun and scares!  Don't pay $25 - $35 elsewhere for just one trip through a single, 10-15 minute haunt when you can spend all night at LOI!

NOTE:  Season's Passes are available for $99 and provide nearly 2 full months of UNLIMITED Halloween entertainment!  Get yours TODAY by visiting landofillusion.com and clicking on Buy Tickets & Passes!

EXTRAS:  Bartenders provide friendly service with a smile, and the visible presence of LOI's Security staff insures the safety of everyone in attendance.  And be sure to visit the Park's other signature events, Christmas Glow and Aqua Adventures!